In French, there are two ways to say “you”: tu and vous. Choosing between them is not just a matter of grammar, but also of culture, etiquette, and social context. The distinction can feel unfamiliar to English speakers, where “you” is used in nearly every situation, but in French, the choice between tu and vous is essential and carries social meaning.

Tu: informal and singular

Tu is the informal pronoun used when speaking to one person with whom you have a familiar or close relationship. This includes friends, family members, children, and sometimes colleagues or classmates if the relationship is casual or friendly. It is always singular.

Examples:
Tu vas bien ? – Are you doing well?
Tu veux un café ? – Do you want a coffee?
Tu as vu ce film ? – Have you seen that movie?

You would normally use tu with:

• your partner or spouse
• your siblings, parents (unless otherwise preferred), and close relatives
• friends of your own age
• children
• pets

In schools, many teachers use tu with students, especially in primary school. Among university students or young adults, tu is increasingly common even in professional settings, though this depends on the environment.

Vous: formal or plural

Vous is either the formal singular or the plural form of “you.” This dual function can be confusing at first.

As a singular pronoun, vous is used as a sign of respect, distance, or politeness. You use it when speaking to someone you don’t know well, someone older than you (especially in formal contexts), or anyone with whom a respectful or professional relationship is expected. This could be a teacher, a superior at work, a customer, or someone you are meeting for the first time.

As a plural pronoun, vous is used when speaking to two or more people, regardless of the degree of familiarity.

Examples:
Vous allez bien ? – Are you doing well? (speaking to one person formally or to a group)
Vous êtes d’accord ? – Do you agree?
Est-ce que vous avez des questions ? – Do you have any questions?

Using vous with more than one person

One of the most important rules to remember is that even if you would normally use tu with someone, you must switch to vous when speaking to that person together with others. Vous is always used when addressing more than one person.

Examples:
You speak to your friend Paul as tu:
Tu veux venir au cinéma ? – Do you want to come to the movies?
But when speaking to Paul and Marie together, you must use vous:
Vous voulez venir au cinéma ? – Do you (both) want to come to the movies?

This applies even if all individuals are people with whom you would individually use tu. The plural vous is required in all cases of direct address to more than one person.

Guidelines for foreigners

If you are new to French or to French-speaking culture, it is safer to begin with vous in most situations. It shows politeness and avoids the risk of being too familiar too quickly. French speakers generally appreciate a respectful tone from strangers or new acquaintances, and using vous achieves this.

Use vous when:

• speaking to someone older than you, unless invited to use tu
• addressing a teacher, professor, doctor, or professional
• talking to a stranger
• speaking in formal or business settings
• addressing more than one person

Use tu when:

• someone explicitly invites you to (On peut se tutoyer ?)
• speaking to close friends or family
• talking to children or teenagers (unless context demands otherwise)
• participating in casual, friendly environments like student life or informal events

Changing from vous to tu

In many cases, people will explicitly invite a change from vous to tu. This can happen in professional or semi-formal settings after some familiarity has been established. The phrase On peut se tutoyer ? means “Can we use tu with each other?” and often marks a transition to a more relaxed relationship.

It is generally not appropriate to take this step yourself unless the other person offers. In hierarchical settings, it is usually the person in the higher position (in age or status) who suggests the switch.